1. ES 88 - 03 - 11 - 02 Gururaj: -- because all the psychologists and psychiatrists and physicians could not help him. So I was walking down the road and I say, “Namaste Mr. Lion, what is your trouble?” He says, “All the birds tweet in my hair and I can't sleep.” So I told him, “Get away from the usual medicine and try alternate medicine.” So this old lion asked me, “What must I do?” So I told him, “Go to that witch doctor.” So the witch doctor treated him and the birds were not coming on his main, and he was sleeping very well. So one week, two weeks, three weeks, later this old lion thought that this witch doctor helped me so much, so he went to the witch doctor and said, “Sir, you helped me, how much must I pay you?” So witch doctor, “No, no, no, no charge,” so this old lion said, “Please, you got to make a living to do also. So please you must charge me.” The witch doctor said, “No, but remember one thing,” and what he said was this, “Rudyard Kipling,” you know the poet of England, Charlie knows, actually in his previous life he was a friend of Rudyard Kipling, “Life will tweet, but it can be so sweet. So let the birds keep tweeting on and you feel yourself that you are gone.” So east is east and west is west. East is east and west is west. So he told this old lion, “You go down the road to the supermarket and buy some yeast,” you know yeast, you make bread, okay you understand, “And rub it in your body.” Someone must massage my back tonight. You're hopeless. So this witch doctor told the old lion, “Rub your body with yeast and all those birds that make a nest in your hair will not come.” And then when this old lion say how much fees I must pay, he said no, no, no, but remember one thing, east is east and west is a west and never the twain shall meet. To interpret poetry is difficult. East is east, west is west, but never the two – twain can meet. Remember this, my friend Mr. Lion, and the birds will not trouble you anymore. You see in life we have so many kinds of birds, you have birds with four legs, and then you have other birds with two legs, they are more danger. You explain them the joke. Many birds -- Translator: I couldn’t understand the – the -- Gururaj: I will make you understand, alright. Now we stopped together. One’s life there are many birds and some of the birds wear beautiful skirts. Translator: -- four legs and three and two legs. Gururaj: Some of those birds have button in front and some of the birds have button at the back. Now you tell me my son, if --

2. ES 88 - 03 - 11 - 02 Translator: Buttons or bottoms? Gururaj: Buttons yeah to put up the skirt. Now if that bird has buttons in front, what are you going to do? -- Who was it? Translator: I don’t know. Gururaj: Will you untie the buttons in front? We’re doing a television show, okay. Interviewing, right, are you going to unbutton the front buttons? Translator: It depends, it depends. Gururaj: Now, for example, if she has buttons behind her skirt, what are you going to do? Translator: Unbutton them – unbutton them. Gururaj: You got AIDS. What I will do is this, I will not worry about the buttons in front, and I will not worry about the buttons at the back, I will just lift up her skirt. Isn’t that more easy? What is life without having little fun? Little joke and we play and we feel happy and we laugh, but remember, you men hear, don't unbutton, because by the time you finish unbuttoning, lift up the skirt there!