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2. UK 83- 20 development of the mind is not after birth only, but even before birth. Round about the seventh month of pregnancy, the mind gathers impressions which it cannot consciously express yet, but they are embedded there in the subconscious. Fine. So, now the child is born. Fine. It goes through certain traumatic experiences away from the comfort of the mother's womb to the outside world. It is a kind of wrench. Many hospitals, they have changed the system now at many places, but many hospitals would take the child away immediately after birth and put it in a crib or baby's cot. And that is so wrong because the child is used to the mother's warmth and the mother's heartbeat. The mother's heartbeat gives the child a feeling of a particular rhythm and it is deprived of that rhythm. But now, just about a few years now, they have learnt that after birth, the child is given to the mother and the mother holds the child to her breast and the child gets a feeling of that same rhythm, so it does not feel as if it is wrenched away. Now, these are impressions the child gets, although the child cannot think yet, but these very impressions are the impressions that will guide the child's thinking as i t grows up. Do you see? Now, the most important years of a little child is up to about when it is three. Up to the age of three, it is still working on instinct and the impressions gained so far. And those three years are the most important years in a person's life. What you have been subjected to, all the impressions you have gathered in the first three years of your life, can make you or break you when you grow up. Most mental illnesses do not come about suddenly, they have started there already, before the age of three. Quarrels in the home are felt by the child because the child too, have consciousness. The consciousness has begun because of the mind beginning at the time of conception. So, if there is a quarrel in the home between mother and father, the child registers all those impressions within itself. Now, when we said that there is only one mind, then where does individuality come from? Individuality comes because of all those impressions. Fine. So, during the first three years, if a child is ill and the child cannot tell you what is wr ong with it, what do we do? Because of the closeness that the child has developed with the mother - and I do disagree with the idea of having Nannies to look after the children, while the poor mother has to go to work because of circumstances or whatever - but there is an intuitive flow between the child and the mother, although the mother might not recognise lt, but there is a flow continually going on. For example, a child is crying and you take the child in your arms and you do that, and the child gets soothed. Do you know why the child gets soothed? Because of the movement of the mother while she was pregnant, naturally has a rhythmic motion in the womb because the child is encased by water, a liquid, so in that liquid, it sways. Therefore little children, because of those impressions, like the swaying movement or the rocking of a crib. Do you see? Now, these things go to prove that the child gathers impressions. Fine.

3. UK 83- 20 So, now, a child is ill, so how does the mother know? Should the mother only rely on the child's crying? How much hunger does a child feel because it has still not started thinking? It feels very little hunger, never as much as a more grown-up child. Because the child has been fed in the womb through the umbilical cord, it still has that craving for something to go into it and not because it is severely hungry. Do you see? It is a habit formed where automatically, food is fed into it while still in the womb. Fine. Now, because of that habit, when a child is born, after a little while, it would want to be fed. Old habits don't die. Fine. Now, in the feeding of the child and while the child is feeding from the mother's breast, they are gaining impressions of sexuality. They start with oral sexuality and then, of course, they start having the impressions of becoming a little aware of anal sexuality. Therefore we say, and all the medical fraternity agree, that sex is the strongest desire in the human being. It's the strongest driving force in a human being because it has started at an age when the child could not even think, but the impressions are laid for its satisfaction. So from the start, from conception, the child is fed with impressions all the time. So, when you find people sexually perverted, for example, it is because of the impressions it has gained even before the thinking processes started. So, those impressions have to express themselves. Now, when the child has the mind, remember it is not only the new impressions that it brings with it, it also brings with it impressions of past existences. In other words, the child is a totality. Now, when a child is to be moulded, the parents should give it such impressions, not on the thinking level, because a child is more intuitive, because it has not started thinking yet and, of course, therefore more impressionable. A child operates when it moves its arms or legs or cries. It does not cry because of thinking processes, it cries because of the impressions. So, now, when a proper rapport has been established between a child and mother, the mother would automatically know the need of a child. The intuitive level is so wonderful and so powerful that the baby could be in the next room and when the baby wakes up, the mother wakes up. I mean, many of you that are mothers have experienced this. Now, what is this force? It is that intuitive force in the child and the child waking up would automatically wake up the mother because of that rapport that has been established. Now we are talking of a good mother, you know, that would really look after the child. Right. Fine. So what damages a child when it starts thinking? It is the thought processes. And schools and grown ups and parents try to mould the child into certain ways of thinking. In other words, the parents block the natural growth of the child by 'You do this' and 'You don't do that' and 'You believe this' and, of course, when it gets a bit older and gets a bit naughty, you say 'The bogey man is coming and taking you away in a bag'. Yes. Now what are you doing? Implanting fear in the child so when it becomes an adult and it becomes fearful who is to blame? The parents are to blame. Do you see? But now the question that we really want to enquire into is how to have total communication with an unthinking child

4. UK 83- 20 and that is totally possible. And that depends upon the rapport that the mother could have with the child or the father could have with the child. A child's mind, because of the impressions that are there the mind is alive. And if we can probe that aliveness in the child then you can actually speak to the child and the child will speak with you in a language silent. You've heard of certain people like St. Francis that could speak to animals and others. And it is definitely done. Give me any child and I will tell you exactly what is going through that child's mind by just looking at it, looking at its eyes and you can find out and know all those impressions that are in the child's mind. And that is what modern psychology lacks because they have not developed, Psychologists have not developed that ability. Many Psychologists that are meditators have come to me specially because they are very interested in child psychology, how to communicate. And you cannot communicate with the child with your conscious mind because your conscious mind is prejudiced, it has biases. But you can communicate with the child at a finer level of the mind and that same level you use to communicate with animals. For example, many homes I visit and this is common experience to my host or hostess, where there are a few animals in the home, pets and it could be a dozen people sitting, and I look at the pet you know with love in the heart and the pet would walk up to me instead of to the others. Why? Because that rapport of love is established. Now if this is so easy with animals, should it not be more easier with humans, a human child. Now diseases of a child could be understood better if the therapist, be it a doctor or a psychologist or whatever, could go to a deeper state of his mind and have a total non-verbal communication with the child. Do you see? So therefore I said a little while ago that the most important years of the child is until he reaches about three. It is true that by the age of one and two, that he starts recognising things, but that recognition is still not on the thinking level. It is on the impressionistic level, on the level of impressions. Fine. When it comes to colours, why is a little child, say a one year old, you put a half a dozen coloured objects there, little toys, it will be attracted to red. Why to red first and not the other? Do you see? That too is because of certain impressionistic things where the eye, the retina could catch red more powerfully than other colours. Do you see? Fine. Now as the child grows older it is gathering all these impressions one by one by one. You can be angry and the child will feel anger more. You can bluff a grown up but you cannot bluff a baby. Yes. You can be angry as hell with someone and yet have a smile on your face and the grown-up won't know, but not a child. The child feels immediately that the person is angry and the same thing applies to every emotion. Love, for example, a child feels immediately. You see?

5. UK 83- 20 So a child has a working mind in an impression form. It is only after it reaches about the age of three that the child gets spoilt, spoiled in the sense that the wrong things are thrown at the little child all the time. And that is why the environment has such an effect upon the child which carries on, in its grown-up life. We parents can do a lot for our children. A lot. Not when they're grown up, because then they are in certain set ways already, but when they are from birth to the age of three. And they would be lasting. They would be lasting and would be carried over in their grown up lives. Whatever impressions are implanted in that little susceptible mind there, will make that grown up what he would be. My mother and father were very fond of the Hindu epics, called the Ramayana and the Mahabaratha and they were composed in poetry form. And my father loved reciting the Mahabaratha. Fine. It’s poetry but you recite it. Can I give you an example now? (Gururaj chants in Hindi) That's how it’s chanted. And of course every bit goes in a different melody, a different meter. And this they were doing while I was still in my mother's womb. So sometimes people ask me that 'You're a very good poet, where did you get it from?' I say 'I got it from my mother's womb'. Do you see? Do you see? So the children, little children even before they can think pick up these impressions. How many people are there that don't like music? A very rare exception. Everyone loves music. Everyone does. As a matter of fact Shakespeare has said in one of his poems that 'Never trust a person who does not like a drink or music'. Yes. So because you like music, a little child enjoys a lullaby, not because it thinks but because of the impressions that are there. That is why all children like lullabies. Do you see? I'm bringing out these various points to show you how important it is in those first three years for parents to be very, very careful. Do you see? Even, even you might quarrel a block away and that child is going to feel it. Like for example a little dog, the master is still a few blocks away and it runs to the front door, thinking the master is coming home. In the same way, in the same way the child functions. In animals we call it at an instinctive level, in humans we call it an intuitive level. Now what happens in the mind is this, that the left hemisphere which the grown up uses so much in analysing and things like that, and thinking, the child does not yet, but the child uses the right hemisphere of the brain, which is, through which intuition is brought about. So if we have grown up children that are not behaving well, blame ourselves first. Fine. Now when the child starts using the left hemisphere, the thinking level, the analytical level, that is where all the troubles begin. Because when it starts thinking a bit, it finds so many contradictions in its environment and it wants to compare it with the impressions that were gained. Now if wrong impressions were gained during the first three years, then the child, if given a choice, will choose something which would be compatible with the impression gained. Good impressions are gained and when it comes to a choice, the child will choose that which is compatible, the good thing which is compatible

6. UK 83- 20 because of the good impressions. Do you see? Now let me say again and again that its so important, - you see he says yes, Ian does - so it is so important in those stages where parents have to be very careful. An unhappy family can never produce a happy child when it grows up. Now Samskaras plays a big part in it. But Samskaras can be redirected because Samskaras too is an energy and it can be redirected, remoulded so that it could become more conducive to live a happier life. Now they talk of hereditary values. Now hereditary values are true, but it has its limitations. It has its limitations. They believe that certain things come down in your blood when you are born. True, true in many instances. Let them come down in your blood but what has that to do with happiness? What has that to do with happiness? A child might inherit a certain disease from a parent because of its past karma, past life. So that is natural. But if the parent could plant the impressions in the child who st ill does not understand, then that very illness the child will accept in such a way that it does not become unhappy. I don't know if I told you before that one of the happiest persons that I've ever met is a person in a wheelchair. She couldn't walk, she was born maimed. And yet the happiness just bubbles over in her. Do you see? So for example if we have a deformed child, we, even before it starts thinking can make that child accept its own circumstances. And this is the role that psychology should play. There is something hereditary yes. You know there was a pickpocket and he met a girl who was also a pickpocket. And they thought to themselves that if we should get married and have a child the child will become a super pickpocket. (General laughter) Fine. So they did get married and the child was born but the child would just not open its fist. And they were quite worried about it, because how is he going to carry on with his pickpocketting profession if he doesn't open its fist. Right. So they went to a doctor and the doctor said, 'Look, I can do nothing about this, let me refer you over to a good Psychologist'. So, they went to the Psychologist and the parents explained what they were that there are pickpockets and you know the child's life would be ruined if it can't open its fist you know to become that super pickpocket. So this Psychologist was a clever guy and he looked at the child, heard the story and then he took out his gold watch and waved it in front of the child's eyes, waved it in front of the child's eyes. And then slowly the child started opening its fist. And do you know what was found in the child's hand? The mid- wife's wedding ring. (General laughter) Yes. Yes. So we, the reason why I thought this question was of great interest is because many people come to me for counselling about their children. Do you see? So now when the child starts thinking then its environment throws so many wrong thoughts to the child. Starts off at home with parents not behaving the way they should and the child starts thinking about that. And then when the child reaches school age and then a lot of wrong things are thrown into the child's

7. UK 83- 20 mind creating anger, creating fear, creating greed and all kinds of things. In school, a child pinches a pencil from another child, comes home and the parents won't say anything about it. 'Ah well, it saves me from buying a pencil' - saving twopence. You see? Things are wrong. So naturally when the child grows up, it would have that larceny and thievery in its blood. You see? A parent came to me with their boy of about eleven I think, eleven or twelve. Now in South Africa in the schools there, you have a period called the free period and in the free period the teacher discusses anything they like, to the children. This little teacher, I don't think she was more than nineteen or twenty, a real idiot, yes. There are many teachers in the world today that would be better off as street-sweepers rather than teachers. Yeah. So this teacher in one of the free periods, was telling the children that if you travel in an aeroplane and a window breaks - she was talking about the pressurisation in a plane - when the window breaks, you can get sucked out. You know. And then after you get sucked out, you'll die and all these things and all the seats will get sucked out and you know, things like that. This poor child, hearing that from the teachers, developed such fear of wind that if it was a windy day, the child wouldn't want to go out thinking that its neck would be twisted. Oh, he started getting nightmares remembering what the teacher said. So the mother, the parent I think it was the mother, yeah, it was the mother came to see me and brought the child. I talked to the child and explained me these things and it is so easy to communicate with children if you know. If you have the love, that's a primary quality and it could be any child and if you have the love, you can really probe. I mean at the age of eleven, twelve you can really get into the child. Fine. And these are the things I found out. So I says, 'Well tomorrow morning, what school are you at?' I took the address and I went to the school and I says I told the mother 'Meet me there at the school such and such a time'. I went to see the Principal and I said 'Could you call Miss So and So', whatever her name was, 'to the office'. So the Principal did. So I started talking to this teacher and I says 'When you talk about all these various things in your free period' and I gave her some instances, I said 'Do you know how you're damaging the children by implanting fear into them of that which is not real. How many times has an aeroplane window broken and how many people have been sucked out? I've never heard of one'. This teacher's brain should have been sucked out. So then she realised, thank God, of her mistake and she said 'Sir, I didn't realise this. I didn't know this and of course I shall be very careful in future'. Fine. Now what I'm trying to point out and illustrate to you that a child even when it has started thinking is subjected to all these things in our sick society. It is said that in America, you know they worked out the viewing time of a child and they worked it out round about three hours, three and three quarter hours a day and during that time, over a period of a year,

8. UK 83- 20 the average American child is subjected to thirteen thousand killings or murders. Right. Isn't that one of the reasons and of course our newspapers, isn't that one of the reasons why there's so much violence in the world. The best way - now we can't change the T.V stations or the newspapers, can we - so the best way is in those three years when the child is born, is to plant ideas of non-violence like treating the child gently, non-violently. Right. All these things are there. We said a while ago that sex is the greatest instinct in human being, the most powerful one. Right. Now today you open up newspapers, open up page three of the Sun and you'll find, is it page three or four. Voice. Page three. Gururaj. Page three. I was told about it yeah. (General laughter) I must really find a chance to look at it one day. Voice. Look at them. Gururaj. No the paper. (Gururaj laughs) Yeah. Page three. Right. Then all the news in papers are nothing about sex and rape and killings and violence and like this, these things are thrown on and on and on to the child making society a sicker and sicker society. Now how to protect the child from being influenced by the environment is what you plant into the child in that first three years. The more love you show the child in those three years, the more loving it will become. The more you treat the child with kindness and care, the more loving and caring it will become. And then all that which society throws against it, the child will not be affected like others. Child delinquency we hear so much of it today, they just never became delinquent because they wanted to. It started off in those first three years by uncaring parents. And the basic need of everyone is love. And then when the child grows up, he tries to find that love in some way or the other. A child learns to steal or to smoke what do you call that? Hashish, hashish, yeah, all that, because of the peer group. He learns from the peer group. And why does he want to learn from the peer group? Because it wants love from that circle of friends. You see. That's the basis of it. They want to belong and the basis of belonging is to find love. You see. So it all starts in that first three years. Now if Psychologists, when looking at the sick child, could communicate with the child on that finer level, not the conscious mind, then the Psychologists would be in a better position to understand what's wrong with the child. So parents play a great part in moulding it so that the child will not be influenced by society and the doings in the world as

9. UK 83- 20 they grow up. Now, how can we become better parents? By becoming better meditators and doing it regularly. For spiritual practices produces that love in you, produces that kindness in you. I've seen little babies of meditating parents and you could recognise those babies a mile away. You could recognise a mile away that, 'Ah this child comes from meditating parents'. That is I find, about the only solution to make our children the future generation, the future leaders of the world into better people by starting with ourselves. Do you see? Got a few jokes here. You know a young man came to me and he says 'Guruji, you've given a few thousand talks and you know and you're an experienced speaker. Now I've got a job on tonight, I've got to be an after dinner speaker and I've never spoken in public although you know they're only twelve, fifteen people that will be at the dinner but I feel so afraid already now y ou know to get up and say something'. I says 'Look, it’s so simple. You just get up and say whatever you like. You do not need to be afraid. But remember one thing, here's a tip for you, that if in the first ten minutes you don't strike oil then stop boring'. (Gururaj laughs) You know this woman ran into an office and you know there was a man there with a white coat. So she says 'Doctor, what's wrong with me, please tell me'. So this man looks up and down and he says 'You are fifty pounds over weight number one. There are three things I want to tell you. Number one, you are fifty pounds over weight. Number two, you must get off all those layers of rouge and lipsticks off your face. And number three, I'm an artist. The doctor's office is down the passage.' (General laughter) And then of course this couple was coming to listen to Guruji, and the lady was upstairs getting ready and the husband was pacing. And he kept on saying 'Darling we're getting late for the lecture, you know’. So she shouts back that, 'Haven't I told you a half an hour ago that I'll be ready in two minutes?' (General laughter) Good. And of course you know many of you have been in the army, so one day when the parade, the drill the sergeant said, 'How many of you are here that loves music?' So about four, five chaps stepped forward. 'Yes Sir, we love music'. So he says 'Well, go to the canteen and shift the piano to the mess hall'. Now here's simple logic and this happens quite a lot with my wife and me. She says to me 'Love, would you lend me twenty pounds, but don't give me the twenty pounds now, just give me ten pounds' - because she knows I'm forever broke, right - 'Give me twenty pounds, lend me twenty pounds but just give me ten pounds now'. Fine. So I give the ten

1. UK 83- 20 Gururaj. Good, what shall we talk about this morning? Questioner. Bapuji, what are the mechanics of a child's mind? Gururaj. Wasn't that a question you asked me and we postponed it? Ah, good. What are the mechanics or the psychology of a child's mind? So little has been known about it by Psychologists and Psychiatrists, because their method of treatment lies mostly in response. Now, a little child, being unable to speak, could never tell the Psychologist what his or her problems are because, to say again, they are dependent upon what you have to say. And according to what you have to say, they guide you by trying to probe deeper into your mind. But now, with the child lacking that response, what can be done? And so little is understood about the mind. Fine. Where does the mind come from? How does the child have a mind and how does it develop? Where does perception begin? And the various conceptions it is subjected to and how are they received? Fine. A child's mind starts at the moment of inception. As soon as the sperm penetrates the ovum, the mind is there already. Fine. Because the togetherness of the ovum and the sperm already contains the mind which is universal, for there is only one mind. Good. There being only one mind, the child, without having its brain cells developed in the embryo stage, is not cognisant of the workings of the mind, although it is there. Fine. Now, as the child develops in the embryo and as brain cells start forming, then the child becomes slightly aware of the warmth of the womb, it becomes aware of the mother. When the foetus reaches about seven months then certain amount of perception takes place. So it is very important for a pregnant woman that when it gets to about the seventh month of pregnancy, that her mind is filled with good thoughts, holy thoughts, uplifting thoughts, for they create a subconscious impression on the foetus, or the unborn child's mind. In the East, we have a system where a ceremony is performed when the woman is seven months pregnant. It’s a holy, religious ceremony. Then after that, she does not stay with her husband. And there, having a matriarchal system, mother- in -law is the boss and, of course, all the daughters- in -law in the house are made to work whilst she would sit back in an armchair. Fine. So the reason why the pregnant woman goes to her mother is that who is there to look after her better than her own mother, not the mother- in -law. Fine. So she is given enough rest and she would do a lot of reading of religious books, Scriptures, she would listen to holy discourses, to spiritual men, so the mind is forever filled with goo d positive thoughts. And that has a marked effect on the subconscious mind of the unborn child. So you see, the

10. UK 83- 20 pounds. So the next day she says 'You know I've been thinking that you had to give me twenty but you gave me ten. That means you owe me ten and I owe you ten. So we're quits'. (General laughter) Now here is a question of simple subtraction. This man says 'I earn eighty pounds a week. Fine. Out of that I've got to pay twenty pounds in taxes' - the teacher asked this question to a child, of course. 'Say, if your father earned eighty pounds a week and you had to pay twenty pounds in taxes, ten pounds in national health and ten pounds in insurance. And then from the balance, he keeps half and he gives the other half to your mother. How much, what will she have?' So the child says, 'A heart attack'. (General laughter) You know talking of teachers, you know what they do. This school teacher went across a red traffic light and she got caught by the traffic policeman. And later she got a summons and had to appear in Court. So meanwhile the Judge that was on the bench, he had quite a tough time with his teachers when he was at school, so this teacher, this lady says 'Sir, I've got to go back to my classes, so please could you, you know, hurry it up or something like that'. So the teacher says, the Judge says 'Oh so at last I've got a teacher in my Court, I've been looking for one. And it’s the first time I've got a teacher in my Court'. So he says 'I won't fine you but you sit down there at that desk and write five hundred lines - 'I shall not cross a traffic, red traffic light again". Good. Now I have a very, very pleasant and pleasurable duty to do now and - fine. Can I have these two pillows? END


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