1. U S 82 - 47 MEMORY AND LIVING IN THE PRESENT This is a satsang with Gururaj Ananda Yogi, recorded at Swan Lake, August 21, 1982, a.m. PRASEELA: Gururaj, can you tell us what is memory and why is the mind subject to memo ry? GURURAJ: What is...? PRASEELA: Memory. GURURAJ: Memory ah. What is memory? [cough] You said memory, memory. PRASEELA: Mem or y. GURURAJ: Mem or y. PRASEELA: Why is the mind subject to memory? GURURAJ: To memory um hem. Who says you have a memory? You do not have a memory. Memory only means that you are reliving in your mind same thing that happened in the past, that which you call memory. In other words, your mind is filled with all kinds of memos, and you re memo them. Why is th e mind subjected to this state of affairs which you term memory? Why must you have all those memos in your mind and relive them all the time? The mind is like a sponge that could collect anything fed into it. By itself the memos have no value whatsoever . They can be discarded if the mind is made non responsive to any incident that could happen. So, a great harm is done in a sense to relive the past, and by reliving the past you are totally forgetting the present. And not only that, you have your memos and those memos you project into the future. So you are at this moment non existent. And yet you should be existing. Your every nature is existence. For nothing in this universe can exist without you. Even that which we call God. God exists because y ou exist, and you exist because God exists. So, to have memories is to deny existence. You are not existing and by not existing you do not know what life is. Because life is an isness and isness is the only viable existence. So here we are living in the past and projecting the past

2. U S 82 - 47 into the future. Now the mind, although we call it a storehouse of memories, is nothing else but to repeat again a sponge. A sponge that draws water. You put it into water and it be filled with water. But if the mind is not fed with the water, the sponge is not fed with the water, then it will remain dry and that very dryness is the existence of the moment. For there is no past and there is no future. It is also just a fixture of one's imagination. So the memory that you are reliving is fictitious. It is fiction. The only thing that is non fiction is the here and now of life. And all joy of life depends in the discovery of the here and now. Eternity we use that word so often but so misunderstood. What is eternity? Can you measure eternity? Can you measure et ernity in the terms of time? If you measure eternity in the terms of time then naturally you have to add on space, because time and space co exist. And what happens when you are mixed up in time and space? You are spaced out timelessly. [Laughter] So w e all are a bunch of lunatics [Laughter]. That's what it means. Memory. Why should I remember what Jean said to me yesterday or Joan said or John said or Jack said? Why should I remember it? Because I am accustomed to two things, pain and pleasure. And that very attitude or habit of being accustomed to these feelings of pain and pleasure is the water in the sponge of the mind. Then we complain of being miserable. Now that water that is in the sponge of the mind can never remain fresh. It stagnates it self and misery is nothing else but a great big stink. Now Jean has told me something nice yesterday so I relive it today. I relive the pleasure of yesterday. But did I live that pleasure in that moment looking into Jean's eyes, and when she told me "I love you" did I experience that at that very moment, when Jean said "I love you." From the depths of her heart, not from her mind. Because if she had to say that to me from her mind it would be very surface. It would be analytical and rationalized. So w hat I am remembering today is the rationalization and the analytical value of the feelings of Jean that told me "I love you." Do you see? So, the point we are making is this, that all that goes through the mind in the form of these memos or memory is a nalysis, rationalizations. And yet you will know that any form of analysis or rationalization can never be permanent, for tomorrow Jean will say to me that "I found another boyfriend." Where do I stand now? So that very pleasure which I did not recognize at the moment and only carried it to the next day in the form of memory, in the form of rationalization, becomes irrational because she has now fallen in love with someone else. There pain begins. So those memories, those rationalizations produced pleas ure, and now we re rationalize those rationalizations which is causing us pain. God's greatest gift to mankind is the ability to forget. Forget. So what do we have to get? We have to get forgetfulness. Now there is a fullness in forgetfulness. And wit hin that fullness of forgetfulness past ceases, projection into the future ceases, for that future does not exist. But this moment exists. Good.

4. U S 82 - 47 to her that you are too damned sexy yourself and that is why you are attracting this kind of a reaction. You see. So we attract to us what we are. If we are hateful within ourselves you attract that. If we are loving within ourselve s, you attract that. If you are kind, you attract that and become more kind. If you are compassionate you attract compassion. Now all this has a bearing upon memory. Upon the impressions in your own mind which keeps on churning and churning and churnin g. All the time there. So, the way out is to forget the churning of the mind. Forget it. If you are hateful be hateful. If you are subjected to intense fits of anger, be subjected to it. Just be. But do one thing: dive deep within and infuse that v ery hatred or anger with that force, that pure consciousness that is within yourself. And then the hatred loses its power. It gets pushed out. The anger gets pushed out. Do you see? The memories gets pushed out. Who wants memories of pleasure and pain? Who want to relive things that happened last week? So I slept with a beautiful woman last week. Am I going to rechurn that in my mind all the time, and the sensations I experienced? Am I going to? No I'm going to sleep with her now again and live tha t moment and forget it. Do you see? And this can only be brought about in every aspect of life by drawing that energy from within. These yogis, these so called gurus that teach different kinds of meditations, they tell you your mind must become blank, y our mind must become thoughtless. Now that is a thoughtless thought. You cannot make your mind thoughtless. Your mind will have the thoughts. You cannot destroy them. And the more you try to control them the more they control you. If there are monkey s jumping around on a tree you can't stop them jumping by shaking the tree, they'll jump more and create a greater noise. Like the mind which is forever noisy. But you leave the tree alone, leave them alone, leave the monkeys alone and all those monks an d monkeys will be quiet. Do you see? So by leaving the mind alone and not interfering with memories, they could fade out by instilling in the mind that power that is within. And when you instill that inner force that is there within you, when you draw th at out from deep within yourself and fill the mind with that consciousness, then your mind will stop making more memos. There won't be place for it. Because memory is subjected to time and place, as I mentioned earlier just now. It is subjected to time a nd place because for memory to exist you need a time and the time you need is past. And you need that space within the mind. So why fill the mind with that kind of space instead of consciousness. You're not conscious of your memory because if you were co nscious of your memory you would be the observer of the memory. Get this very, very clear. You are not conscious of your memory because consciousness and memory can never exist together. You relive your memory in that space you have created, and by reliv ing your memory in the space you have created, you have pushed consciousness aside. So therefore we are all asleep, we are unconscious. We are not living in consciousness. Even sleep itself should be conscious and not a blackout. Where you are consciou s of that being within you all the time, even during deep sleep the awareness is there and you are conscious of everything around you. The only time I get conscious is when I take a

5. U S 82 - 47 few scotches before going to bed. Then I have the blackout. Otherwise li ghts are shining all the time. My eyes are closed, the lights are off and yet there's light, light, light. I get so fed up I say "Dammit the bloomin' lights. Switch t hem off." Do you see? So what is memory? Memory is only reliving things that happened in the past. Did they really happen? Did things really happen? And what is the reality contained in those happenings? If it was real then it would have existence in reality. But that experience was not real. That experience was real to you because i f your own interpretations of it. So where do you go beyond what we know to be real or interpret to be real? We try to reach the actual. Was the experience actual? You go see a magic show and you find things happening. The magician performs these vario us tricks of illusions and you see the woman cut in half or the elephant disappearing, and all kinds of illusions like that. So examine this that the experience I had, was it a real experience? Was it an actuality, or was it real only in my interpretatio n of it. And if it was real only in my interpretation of it then it has been subjected to a previous memory. Because then to find the reality of it I start comparing: Joan was nice but Jean is nicer. So every time one evokes in the mind memories, at th e same time a comparison goes on there. It is comparing, comparing all the time. It is comparing the apparent realness with a projected realness which too is not real. Something happened last week and you do not remember that happening only, but you star t comparing with something else which you think should have happened. Yes. So I had a little accident last week. My brakes failed on the car. But that's not the only thought that's going in your mind of the brakes failing in the car. You are comparing it to something else: I wish I had a better car. Those two co exist. The one memory brings about with it a projection about what you think should have been, and because it never happened or you did not have the facility of what should have been, that m emory becomes a pain. So who's creating the pain? Ok the brakes failed. So what. They failed. I do not need to think in my mind that instead of driving a little Volkswagen it should have been a Cadillac. Then this would have not happened. You see. So this should not have happened. What does that mean? This should not have happened. Analyze that. Why should it not have happened? Prefix it with why. Now, at that very moment when the brakes failed and it happened, you stopped the whyness and you st op the comparison and say ok it happened, so what, damn it. Do you see? Acceptance of the situation at the moment. And when this situation is accepted totally at the moment it will leave no impression on the mind. The mind's stenographer won't take down the memo. Do you see? So what happens there? What are the mechanics there now? Is instant recognition. To recognize the fact instantly as is, not as reality or unreality, but as is, which means actuality. You see. this is actual. And once you see th e actuality in a thing instead

6. U S 82 - 47 of the apparent reality then no impression is left on the mind, and when no impressions is left on the mind, it will not surg e up in the mind as memory. So therefore, to repeat again, God's greatest gift given to man is to forget. To forget. Something does not work out, why does something not work out? Because you expected it to work out. And it did not work out mixed with your expectation brought about that pain which now slowly gnaws at you, goes deeper into your mind . The boy loses his girlfriend which he thought he loved very much. They were together, for example, for seven years. And yet now and then the thought might crop up. A certain situation arises and the mind goes back and thinks of a similar situation an d a thought crops up. Good! But, how much does the thought effect you? That is the question. If you cannot get rid of past memories, past occurrences, don't bother. But how does it effect you? So the boy was with the girl for seven years and then he meets another girl, another woman who he falls in love with. Good. And yet some of those past thoughts will crop up occasionally. Nothing wrong. But to remain unaffected by those thoughts, by those memories, therein lies the secret. To be totally unaf fected. What was was. Or was it, really? How can any reasonable thinking human being mix up the past with the present? I can't understand it. But it's happening around me everywhere. How can you mix up the past with the present? The past is gone, go ne, gone, gone, gone. And if it is gone it should be forgotten. So to be here and now is the secret of joy, is the secret of how to be rid of memories. Painful or pleasurable, it makes no difference. For pain and pleasure are but two sides of the same c oin. So you have to let go of pain and pleasure and reach the field of joy where neither pain nor pleasure exist. So this man lived with this woman for seven years. Ok! Then he finds things did not just work out. Gone. Forgotten. He meets another wo man and he falls in love with her. Is he going to confuse or infuse the past experiences of that woman that he lived with for seven years with the present woman who he is in love with now? That would be idiocy, absolute totally idiocy. For the woman he has started loving now is an entity on her own, and he loves her for the sake of her being her and not for her being Jean, Joan or Joy, whatever you have. You see. Now, this applies to male and female. You know the singular applies to the plural and the plural to the singular. A legal terminology. [END SIDE ONE] So any rational, thinking being should always have this in mind, that there is no past, there is only the nowness of life. There is no future. There is only the nowness of life. I exist now. I do not know any more that I existed in the past. And I do not know if I will exist in the future, but I exist now. And here, and this hereness of the nowness is eternity. Eternit y is not a matter of time or space. You can never measure eternity by the amount of years. Eternity is so many billions and billions times billions squared and.... No. There is no eternity in time. That is why we say eternity is timeless. And thi s

7. U S 82 - 47 very split second is a timelessness. And if you can find that split secon d of timelessness you're thrown right within your center, the center of your being. That very split second of timelessness is where you find the oneness with Divinity. That very split second gives you the realization that I and my Father are one. And th at very realization in that split second is eternal. That's eternity. That's realization. That's illumination. That's awakening. So, sleep is spent in time. Wakefulness is spent in the moment. But we sleep 24 hours of the day, 24 hours of the day we are fast asleep. We walk in our sleep, we eat in our sleep, we do everything in our sleep, we make love in our sleep. What kind of life is that? Gor blimey! Ah shucks! [Laughter] What kind of life is that? Where you live in death. Let go of death. Live. And this is not difficult. That puzzles me. So simple, and we ignore the simplicities and make things difficu lt for ourselve s and others. Then all because of memory all the negativities, so called negativities, follow in the footstep of memories: fear, inadequacy, insecurity. [Tape has been hard to hear for some time. Here it goes blank.] [Tape returns but seems to have re corded backwards.] ****END****

3. U S 82 - 47 So the mind is nothing else but a receptacle of impressions of thoughts of the past. And then the mind uses them, for most times the water in the sponge cannot just contain itself; it becomes heavy. So the water drips and where does it drip? To the future. And that very dripping to the future is projection into the future. So past and future, both non exis te nt and therefore the mind has no value in its very so called existence. I've said this many times before that God plus mind makes man, man minus mind makes God. So the greatest obstacle towards Divinity or becoming one with Divinity is this that we call m ind which is nothing else but a collection of all kinds of impressions which we created ourselves over the ages. So if mind is the obstacle in the way to Divinity, what do we do with the mind? For all impressions contained in the mind of all those experi ences, all those samskaras, you could never get rid of them. You could never get rid of them for even any impressions of thought is not destructible. But you can let go of them, not get rid of them. You can discard them but not annihilate them. It is co nditioned, the mind is conditioned by impressions. So what we have to do is uncondition the mind. It is like taking a piece of string and wrapping it around your finger and then the process through spiritual practices is to unwrap it from your finger and free the finger. That is how you let go of the impressions contained in your mind. "Let go" means to discard them. Now the question would remain how do you discard these memories, these impressions? How do you do it? It is not something that you cou ld pull out through the ears and throw them in the trash can. No. You have the third force in there, the force that is always with you. Star Wars. That force that comes from your inner self can be utilized, can be consciously brought out so that the bl ockages of the impressions in the mind are pushed away. They are not destroyed. They will go to places where they would find attraction. If there is hatred there it will go to hatred. Therefore people ha ve influence upon each other. Everyone being tot ally connected to this universe, there is no separation at all, those vibrations are forever in one big massive container, to use that analogy for want of a better one. So along those lines, along those electrical cords, along those vibratory cords, the ha tred is discarded and goes to the place where it is most attracted like a magnet. So if you are hateful you'll attract to yourself all the hatreds, all the thoughts of hate that is in the entire universe. You attract it, depends how strong a force, a mag netic force you could yield. And the same thing applies to love; the same thing applies to pleasure; the same thing applies to pain. The same thing applies to everything. One day a young lady came to me for counseling and we were chatting. Actually she even came to America on a trip with me once. She says, "Guruji, there’s one thing I just cannot understand. Men find me attractive." She was a pretty girl. "Men find me attractive but they find me attractive for the wrong reasons. They find me attracti ve to go to bed with. And that's where it ends, nothing more." So I spoke to her and I said, "Why, why is this so? What are the dominant thoughts in your mind?" I did not ask her this so directly as I am saying it. I had to go round and round and roun d until I pinpointed