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United States 82-9

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2. U S 82 - 9 VOICE: To see you do that [LAUGHTER], because my visual sensation's always very different from [???] of the time. And this time it was...as usual you have an enormous amount of light around you, and at one point all that I could see that seemed to be real was your head. And the rest of you was, sort of, pulsating. It was very...I couldn't even really say what it wa s. It was just that your head was standing out very distinctly in this, sort of fog of light. And then the rest of it was pulsating. And then there were other sensations also. The next one was that everything in the room started to become more and more indistinct and hazy. And then underlying all of that was, sort of, a constant hum, which I think is almost gone now. GURURAJ: Something like [HE DEMONSTRATES]. VOICE: A little higher. And last but not least, some clear [??????]. That's smells. [HE LAUGHS] GURURAJ: Ah, very good. Very good. What color was the light? VOICE: The light was... GURURAJ: Around me. VOICE: It was primarily yellow. But I couldn't tell because of your yellow shirt and white background. It was sort of alternating b etween yellow and white. And it was that type of [???????]. GURURAJ: Beautiful experience. Beautiful. Where all your physical senses were activated. [GLITCH]...smell. Smelling, hearing, seeing. Good. VOICE: I could see areas of light shooting ou t of both sides of your head, and I expected to see that around your shoulders with the white background and I didn't. But I kept seeing... it wasn't a fast starting, but a big blop out of her e and a big blop out of here. And I usually don't see that be cause you have the dark background at the back of your head. It was real luminous. And if anything, it was yellowish. GURURAJ: Good. Good.

3. U S 82 - 9 VOICE: My experiences were much the same. I could only add as a good scientist I felt I had to check for opti cal illusions. So, I looked at the you were gold, surrounded by gold so I looked at the emblem and it actually looked much as it does now. So, I tried you again and you were still gold. Then I tried the plant and it, you know, was sort of green a nd wh ite. And then I tried you again and you were still gold. So, that was sort of interesting. The other aspect was that your hand glowed, sort of like you put a flashlight behind it. That's all I can describe, really. CHETAN: My impressions were similar . You were like a statue of molten gold when it's fluid, it was so brilliant. And silhouetted outside of that the hair, everything was that color. The face was just beaming out this light. The skull seemed to change. And at one point it looked very, v ery young like a baby. And then the skull seemed to get rounder and shorter from the top to bottom, and rounder. And the eyes became enormous. Both eyes became enormous. Around you I would see, at first, it appeared to me, a very beautiful sky blue. N ot very white. And then as time went on it seemed to change, become more violet. Very fine. And this wasn't steady, but seemed to pulsate also. Also, when you since I was looking mainly at your face, or away at times, to clear my vision, and then back again when you blessed us with your right hand, all of a sudden I could see all around you, especially even more to the sides, not so much in the middle, because that was more gold, this beautiful light violet. It was a light, not a color. Color of lig ht. And this persisted for a long time. GURURAJ: Very valid. Very valid, because as you travel through the universe, different levels of energies are perceived with different colors. Immediately you see a color, you know exactly at what level of fineness of energy you have reached. So, on th is journey to the finest relative, and even beyond, you go through a whole spectrum of these colors. And you capture a certain color at the point where I am at in this journey. Very valid. Very. VOICE: I was just going to say, I don't know, empty is n ot quite the word for people who experience the light, I'm afraid I got sent to the laundry. My experiences were intense vibration and heat, tremendous amount of heat. It was kind and occasionally very intense, and feeling as though I was actually being flattened out and put through a wringer. And following that my movements were not my own, but they were gentle, and my spine seemed to have been manipulated. I say, I rather envied the light experiences, I felt as though I'd been through a wringer. [LA UGHTER] GURURAJ: Very good. VOICE: So, if anyone else had those they were...

4. U S 82 - 9 GURURAJ: Very good. Very good. She wants to... Stella, stand up, so that everyone can hear you. STELLA: My feelings were the same vibration [???]. And everything was vibrating, and I could feel something pulling, wanting to pull out of me to join you. And I was trying to keep it back, I didn't want to go. GURURAJ: Why? STELLA: And then I fully surrendered and I was with you and... GURURAJ: Yes. Never keep it ba ck, let it go. Yes. Beautiful. Beautiful. Because the intensity of the vibrations do heighten in this experience. I'll go into that just now. [Bobby?], stand up. I'm the only one allowed to sit. [LAUGHTER] VOICE: It may sound a little strange, but i nstead of an after image there was a "before" image. I'm not sure what it meant but, except there was a sense of, you know, when you close your eyes and you see an image, well, I saw it before it was there. [INAUDIBLE]. And I was [alone [??] there?]. There was just a violet mist [INAUDIBLE]. GURURAJ: Who had that experience seeing me disappear totally, and just a light remained? One, two. You [???????]. Good. Good. Good. VOICE: [INAUDIBLE] GURURAJ: Very good. You have no right to see one of my past lives. [LAUGHTER] Because in this process, you go through all your previous lives; right back, back, back, back, to the source. Very good. VOICE: [??????]. VOICE: I have a question rather than an experience. I'd like to know what it does to your body if this is a big energy drain, or is it terribly rejuvenating [INAUDIBLE]. Can you tell us something about the experience?

5. U S 82 - 9 GURURAJ: When you leave the body, you leave behind a very small portion of your consciousness. That is to keep the body alive. And the major portion of your consciousness, of your mind, you can say, is away, gone, to merge with the Divine. So, having this conscious going away, it does d eplete physical strength from you. And after you return, you feel totally regenerated. You feel as if you are ten, twenty years younger. So, at first, you feel a weakness. And then slowly, about half an hours time, while we chat around, you feel fine an d on top of the world. Barbara had her hand up over there. BARBARA: [INAUDIBLE] I felt sometimes very hot like my skin was burning, and the room between your body and mine was just light. I don't know if it's the fluorescent lights or what, but it seeme d like I was going to pass out. And...and at one point I felt pulled to look over in this direction and I was looking at Caroline. And when I looked back at you she was moving to the same movements you were coming out and her lips were closed she was m oving to the same movements. She was breathing the same as you. GURURAJ: Yes. Yes. That is true. That is true. There is only one breath, there is only one life, and there is only one Divinity. And all else that the senses perceive are just but litt le bubbles on the pond, bubbles filled with air. That's all. In reality, that's all the same water. Good. VOICE: Guruji, I thought, well, first of all my hands got real hot. It was like I was looking for ice water. But I thought I saw...the name that came to mind when I saw the face was Abraham Lincoln. And I, you know, a beard. And it was a man of great stature and of great leadership. And then the face switched to what I imagine a great American Indian leader would look like. And that's what I sa w. GURURAJ: Well, I have been born in every nation and in every race. So, you captured me while I was passing that. Very good. CHETAN: I forgot to mention before, Guruji, when your [skull?] changed and became rounder [in the eyes or so?], I had the v ery distinct impression that I was looking at [Buddha?]. GURURAJ: I'm not going to answer that. [LAUGHTER]

6. U S 82 - 9 VOICE: [INAUDIBLE] Something Fred said just touched something off. Towards the end it was like there was no separation and the name Kali [?? ??] came in. And that's what I wanted to say. GURURAJ: Yes. Kali is a goddess, the female aspect of Divinity. Very good. Because Divinity is both male and female. There is no separation, because Divinity operates on the spiritual level where there is no sex, no gender, but it has to express itself in the male and female form. It has to have the polarities, the opposite poles, to preserve a continuity. Li ke electricity it could never burn without the negative and the positive wires, and yet negative does not mean bad. It does not mean bad, you need both the wires for the light to burn. So, everyone has the goddess and the [???????]. Both aspects. Roopa. ROOPA: Sitting back here it was wonderful to watch the different stages and there were many. I think the one I liked the most is watching everything in the entire room become brilliantly olive and gold. GURURAJ: [INTERRUPTING] Gold. VOICE: Brilliantly [????] everything, everyone. You know, the bricks, the hair, everything. My favorite part. [LAUGHTER] GURURAJ: The what parts? VOICE: It's my favorite part. No. [LAUGHTER] And it seemed as if sometimes when everything was beco ming brilliantly gold that it was transparent, that because it was made of light it wasn't three dimensional and it wasn't solid. It was just brilliant gold light. And another thing...and that was particularly strong through one portion more than through the whole thing changes. There was also a portion where, like so many of us have said, the lavender and purple, whatever, just really flared out a lot for awhile. Then it was something else. There was a time when there was [???]. So there were differe nt things. GURURAJ: Yeah, so you were following me on the...ah, good. Beautiful. Beautiful. I wish I could take all your hands and take you all with me on the journey. Nice. It will be. You will do it.

7. U S 82 - 9 VOICE: I felt like I was with you. VOICE: We'll be sending postcards. [LAUGHTER] GURURAJ: Lovely. VOICE: I was quite interested in the different expressions and the total change of your face, and the...also the formation of the skull changed for me. The light wasn't there for me, but I did s ee you change [INAUDIBLE]. GURURAJ: Very, very often. Yeah. I go into a similar state when I initiate, when I get forms from America or England or wherever. And when I do initiations I go into a...not the same state, but a very similar one. VOICE: Th e mantras. GURURAJ: Yeah, for the mantras. And, so, therefore, it is not something mechanical. It's something different. You have to be in it. So, that's why sometimes you get your forms late. But the teachers understand why. It's easy to do a hund red, two hundred forms a day, but it would not be genuine or true. And we don't want to be hypocrites. For example, in preparation for tonight I've been preparing for the last four days to go into this communion. I don't let anyone know, bu t I know what 's going on inside me. You see. Good. If there's nothing more, let me tell you...ask you a few questions, perhaps. How many of you felt a deep peace within? Hm? Put up your hands. Oh, practically everyone. Good. It is because a great energy is gen erated. That's why some of you felt it as heat. The same thing, the same energy. Because leaving the body behind and part of the consciousness, and ninety percent or ninety five percent of the consciousness going away, the connection still remains. And the ninety percent consciousness conveys back to the ten percent left in the body. And through that this higher vibration as you described, or the heat, or the peace that you felt emanates. A great energy comes about, surges up and people feel it. Not only in this room, but it extends far and wide. At this very moment while we were in communion, the power is so strong that two miles away someone might be quarreling, and all of a sudden they will just stop the quarrel for no rhyme or reason and say, "So rry, honey." Something like that. And like that, many things, many things happen. It could have been some accident that was just about to happen which was averted. So, the force is very powerful. It is the force of the Divine. I am just an instrument , an ordinary human being. The force is so divine that it helps so many people. And this is

8. U S 82 - 9 actually the meaning of darshan. Somebody asked me about darshan this morning, yesterday or whenever. That is darshan, where you feel that divine energy emanati ng. How many of you saw me as a little boy? Someone mentioned... VOICE: As a baby. GURURAJ: Yeah, yeah. And how many of you saw me as an old man? One thing is for sure, even if any of you...I know many of you might have had experiences, but a few ar e too shy to get up. That I know. But...did you want to say something, Dave? No. Too shy? [HE CHUCKLES]. Yeah. But one thing is for sure, that everyone's heart has been touched by that divine force. And your life could never be the same again. Neve r. Some transformation, some change has definitely taken place in you. It is so apparent on your faces. Yes. VOICE: Guruji, I have a question. GURURAJ: Um hm? VOICE: When you were coming out of the meditation, it was very powerful, I felt this incredible sadness. GURURAJ: Yes. VOICE: Very overwhelming. Is that your feeling? GURURAJ: Yes. Yes. Definitely so. That from this vast area of intense bliss yo u come back into the little body, so it is saddening. And when you observe the suffering of others, it becomes more saddening. And you picked that up. There is work to be done. There is work to be done. That is what we mean when we say that Jesus suff ered. That's what it means. VOICE: [INAUDIBLE] I've always seen you in this state, I've always seen you in a ferocious state, like a warrior. And this time I saw you with glowing red eyes and your third eye was open. GURURAJ: Ah, beautiful. Right. Three eyes. [LAUGHTER] Lovely, beautiful. Yes, ferocious state. Yes, very valid. I'm sure the Old Chap up there must be thinking, "Is this what I created? Is this what I've created?"

9. U S 82 - 9 Just sit back and enjoy. [LONG PAUSE] You're very quiet, Larry. LARRY: [INAUDIBLE] GURURAJ: Ah, yes. Therefore, I've said, sit back and enjoy the peace. Don't just rush out. You know, I think I must have told you, Buddha, his best sermons or teachings or discourses was when he sat down and never spoke a word. A nd all his people sat around him. They thought of various questions, and the answers just dawned within themselves. And they felt the peace of darshan. And that was the sermon. Good. Perhaps, one day we'll be able to do that. I'll just sit still and yo u sit in total peace and just know whatever there is to know. In other words, no verbal communication but an inner communication. You're nicely curled up like a cat. You are shining like gold, Matthew. You know, I see so many beautiful auras around you people. I don't know if you know one thing, that when I do satsangs I'm just dimly aware of what I'm talking about. It's only afterwards when I listen to the tapes then I say, "Oh, did I say this?" that kind of thing. And then I'm not even aware of t he people sitting around, I just see blobs of light. Some very bright, some less, some a bit dim just light, all the time. And everything is just covered in a golden haze. Smile! Coffe e. I'm surprised he's not laughing today. VOICE: I did not find this a terribly happy occasion. GURURAJ: Poor girl. SAME VOICE: It wasn't its usual uplifting, happy, joyous kind of thing. GURURAJ: I'm so sorry for you. VOICE: Well, no, I just.... I'd rather not have learned what I learned. GURURAJ: I always tease her, you know. You know, this bachelor he used to go to a restaurant very regularly, and he liked his wahfles or is it waffles?

1. U S 82 - 9 U.C.L.A. COMMUNION VOICE: This is a sats ang with Gururaj Ananda Yogi. U.S.A., 1982, number nine. Recorded at U.C.L.A. GURURAJ: You traverse the entire universe and there is no time. It is a different dimension, filled with so much joy, so much luminosity. It is indescribable. Every partic le, every atom becomes alive and you see it all. You become one with it. And in that intensity of oneness there is nothing else there but a love, a divine love. Unexplainable. Through various layers and layers of that which is beyond this dimension you go and you go and you go and you go to the finest. And then you know what oneness is. You feel like staying away in that joy. You have to come back. There's so much to do. So much to do. And when you come back to your human consciousness, the sufferin g you see, the turmoil all around. And yet, behind the turmoil in people's hearts and minds you gain a recognition that this is not the first time I've known you. Many of you have I known for ages and ages. What is the purpose, I ask myself, for those t hat I've known so well, to be born again in this time and age, when I took birth. There must be some purpose. There must be some thing that brought us together. Five, six, seven years ago you never knew I existed. And neither did I know you existed. An d here from all corners of the globe we get together. Why? Why? There must be some purpose. There must be some spiritual bond; with some a much deeper one than with others. And yet behind all the heartaches, problems, troubles, seen on the faces of th e people around me, you feel and you also see that divine spark shining, glittering, glowing. When I say to you, "You are divine," it is not mere words. You are really divine. So, I'm back at U.C.L.A. Smiling, laughing, crying, happiness, sadness, I experience all these things through you. Your joy is my joy. Your suffering is my suffering. Your happiness is my happiness. Your pain is my pain. For knowing how to be one with the Divine, I know how t o be at one with you. You just can't help it. Hearts mingle, souls mingle, and you recognize the oneness of the eternal spirit that is there. That is why you take birth. Even Divinity gets lonely. The Manifestor gets lon ely without His manifestation, f or the one cannot exist without the other. It's not necessary to take birth, but when the call comes you have to do it. You have to do it. The bond of love is so strong you are pulled by it. It is beautiful. Beautiful. Good. Would anyone like to dis cuss or talk about any experience they had? You're most welcome to. Would one of you supervise the show of hands, hm? [Jay?], you would?

10. U S 82 - 9 VOICE: Waffles. GURURAJ: Waffles. He liked his waffles with honey. So, then he did this for mo nths and months. Every day he used to go and have his waffle with honey. So, that day when he went they served him the waffle...oh, by the way, he got married. And then he thought, "Let me take my wife to the same restaurant and let her taste this wonde rful waffle and honey." But that day the waitress served waffle with maple syrup. So, he asked, "Where's my honey?" So, she says, so the waitress says, "She's gone on vacation." [LAUGHTER] Good. So, tomorrow will be the last satsang on this course. As a matter of fact, I think our plane is at one. We'll have to leave here at about eleven. How far is the airport from here? How many minutes driving? VOICE: About twenty. GURURAJ: About twenty. VOICE: Twenty minutes. [INAUDIBLE] [DISCUSSION FOLLO WS] GURURAJ: Construction work. So, we'll have to leave at about eleven, I think. [MORE DISCUSSION] **** END ****

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