1. U S 86 - 51 SEPARATION AND UNITY GURURAJ: Now when your facial muscles relax, then very automatically your body follows suit and you'd find relaxation. So after closing your eyes you.... [relaxes face]. With practice it just becomes automatic. And that will help you deepen your meditat ions more, because then your body is in a relaxed state. Otherwise it takes much longer. Because I know meditators sometimes have to spend about fifteen minutes before they can get into a state of relaxation. Like this, it's quick. Good. What shall we t alk about this morning? AVA: Would you talk to us about feelings of separateness? GURURAJ: Feelings of separateness. Right. Firstly, what is separation? Separation is something where you divorce yourself from any person or any object. You can feel s eparate from an object and you can feel separate from a person. Fine. Now what causes that feeling of separation? Separation only comes about because of an improper understanding of the unity that is within oneself. Now when you don't feel yourself to b e together within yourself, then naturally you feel allied or away from the object. So to find the togetherness, one has to find togetherness in oneself. This could be caused by so many, many reasons. This could be caused by a sense of fear, for one, tha t you fear being together. It could also be caused by the sense of a certain kind of mental imbalance which means it is not an integrated mind, it's a fragmented mind. And when fragmentation is concerned, there will always be separation, because you are in pieces. And every pieces seems to be apart from each other, rather than being a part of each other. And that is the main reason for feeling separate. You feel away from the world. Now it is good to feel away from the world, but in a totally differen t sense of not being attached to the world. You can be so unified with everything and everyone, and yet feel totally non attached. And by feeling that non attachment in its true sense, without feeling separate, then you become free of all the fears and anxieties and the mental problems that are created within oneself. Now that is the basis of separation. Now what is the cure? That is the important thing. For example, a person goes to a psychologist or a psychiatrist. Do you know the main reason why they go there? It is not to cure their mental illnesses, mostly; that's partly so, yes. Because one feels separated, that is why you go to a psychiatrist, to show you how to become together with people. Good. Now what do you first do... what does a psy chiatrist do? And I've studied
2. U S 86 - 51 psychiatry very much. I've studied psychology, psychiatry, accountancy, you name it. Okay. Metaphysics, the works. Right. Now why do you go to the psychiatrist? The reason is this, that the psychiatrist with his knowled ge of the mind, draws you out and forms a bond with you, so you feel that you are wanted. Right. Now in making you feel that you are wanted, you slowly lose the sense of separation. So you are starting with one qualified person in his field, although th ey know very little. I've got hundreds and hundreds and hundreds of psychiatrists that meditate with me. As a matter of fact, at one of the world's most famous hospitals, Groote Schuur, in Cape Town, I'm very often called in as a consultant by cardiologi sts and by the psychiatric department. And the head of the psychiatric department at Cape Town University is professor [Lynn Gillis?], who is also head of the psychiatric department of the University of Cape Town. So you go to a psychiatrist firstly, you think to yourself that he will help you through your mental problems. Actually, the thought, the subconscious thought, is firstly that you want to belong, that you want to be with a person that can understand you. Do you see? And what do they do nowaday s, they give you valiums and all kinds of drugs and make you feel calm. That's all what they do. But in that procedure you develop a bond with the psychiatrist. For example, in psychiatry we do have touch therapy where the psychiatrist would touch the pa tient and make the patient feel wanted, and thereby tries to rid the patient of that feeling of separation. But there is one great danger the psychiatrist, as a guru always has, is that they become attached to the psychiatrist or the guru. And the hardest job for the psychiatrist the guru doesn't mind, he knows how to handle that but the hardest job for the psychiatrist is to wean off the patient from the attachment. Good. But is there any cure for that? Because a psychiatrist does not know how to brin g about mental integration, so therefore they introduce medication just to create an euphoria. Excuse my cold and cough. I am quite attached to my cough. I'm enjoying it. I find the irritation to be an irrigation, cleaning out of the toxins in the body. Good. So separation is caused by an innate fear within oneself that one is not wanted. And therefore, having the feeling that you are not wanted, you, yourself, separate yourself from the world. And then what happens is this, you start blaming the wor ld, instead of blaming yourself. You are the one that's separating yourself from the world. The world is not separating themselves from you. If you go to a party, for example, and become a wall flower, right, and sit on the chair. Everyone is having a nice time dancing, and if you go and sit around, naturally you are going to feel apart, separated from all the people having a nice time. But why not go and mix? Start up a conversation on anything. It's so easy. It's so easy. Yes, it's so easy. You st art off by talking. What does a person like most? What does a person know most about? And what does a person think he's an authority on, is his work. So start off chatting about his work. Show an interest, let him talk , or her talk. Just ask a few in telligent questions to spur the person on and you'll form a rapport. Separation disappears.
3. U S 86 - 51 And like that you start mixing with people. For example, you are here, I think, for the first time with our people. Do you feel separated from them? [She replie s: "A little bit"] A little bit? But it was so much yesterday? Yes? More yesterday? Yeah! Do you see? So in our family everyone loves everyone and it's a good therapy. You must attend the group meetings that they have once a week. You would always b e welcome. And you'd be made to feel at home, yes, yes. Because there is a group spirit, there's that family spirit. And that will help you to get rid of that feeling of separation, that you are not alone. You are never alone, the force is with you. [ Laughs] You can ask your questions later. The force is always with you, and if you do not find that force within the environment, there is still another force that wil l never leave you. So here we come to faith. You first start with faith, that that for ce is with me. And that force that is with me is manifested through those that are around me, because that force is abstract, your mind cannot conceive of it. And once you develop that understanding, then there is no separation at all, because the force is with you, and you see that force in its actual manifestation. Do you feel separate from a flower? No. Right. You feel at one with a flower, right, because you do not fear the flower. The flower can't jump up and sock you in the jaw. But you feel separate from a human being because you think that human being can hurt me physically, emotionally, and in any other way that you can think of. But people don't do that. People don't do that. People are essentially very, very kind. It is your approach t o people that could make them show some kind of unkindness. The lover is always loved. As the old saying goes, no one loves a lover like a lover. Do you see. So the true cultivation comes from within ourselves, and for that we need integration through s piritual practices. I know you are just about to start to meditate, and you will find that the treatments you are having (sorry to be personal) the treatments that you are having, I've written on your forms which things to do which will really help you to get rid of the sense of separation. And as you start practicing, all those drugs must be gradually lessened, because they do you no good at all. They are more damaging and the end result would be that you'd feel more separated from it all. And that is how some recluses are in this world. They think they are searching for something far greater than them, all those swamis and what have you. They run away from the world and go to some cave to meditate and do this, that. They are running away. They are e scaping the true issues of life. Now when we accept the true issues of life, then the very acceptance of the true issues of life, whatever they are, would bring you closer to the issues, and the issues of life is very much dependent upon environment. So y ou become closer to the environment. Do you know, there is a story in some ancient Eastern mythology in the Ramayana, where Ravana that abducted the wife of Rama whose name was Sita. Fine. And he hated Rama. He hated Rama so much that Rama was in his mi nd all the
4. U S 86 - 51 time, in the mind of Ravana. In Ravana. The thought of Rama, even in its hatred form, was in Ravana's mind so much that in the end, just by thinking of "Rama, Rama, Rama, Rama, Rama," he became enlightened. Do you see? Do you see. Where is t he separation? So even in hatred you find togetherness. For if you hate someone, naturally there is a togetherness even in the hatred, because if there was no togetherness, if there was no connection even through hatred, then how could there be separatio n. Of course, the better way is love. It is smoother, smoother, more joyful, ecstatic, blissful, pleasurable and happiness providing. Do you see. So we have to evaluate all our emotions. And, of course, if we cannot do them ourselves we have to get pro fessional help, nothing wrong with that. But the professional help we are getting is this, that they try and hook you on. I know psychiatrists that have cases that last for two and three years, as Vidya would bear me out. Why? Because they are moneymak ers. The more visits you make the more money you have to pay, through insurance or cash or whatever way. Do you see? They are doing people more harm than good. Now a guru doesn't function that way because he doesn't want your money. Do you see. He t ries to give of himself and make you understand that there is no separation at all. I personally do not find myself separate from this chair I am sittin g on. I am merged into this chair. And this chair has become a part of my body. A chair, right, whic h is regarded to be insentient. But what about a human being, how much closer can I not be? The chair can't answer me back, or rub my back if it's sore. But a human being can. So if we want to produce the togetherness from people towards us, we have to be firstly together with them, that is important. You see, so having these intensives and group meetings has great value. There is an atmosphere created, and you might know this, that everyone emanates a certain radiation, if you wish to call it that. An d being in a group, all those radiations form into one, helping each other. Do you see. It's like rain falling, and with potholes on the road, and where the hole is bigger, more water will go in. But the end result would be that there's a lovely smooth sheet of water. And that happens in a group. So where is the separation? Do you see? So in the beginning some effort is required, and when one does a little effort, it becomes effortless. In many therapies that I've done for people I encourage them to do one thing, that when you are in trouble, for example, dealing with alcoholics, I tell them, I say look when you have that intense craving or you are feeling bad, pick up a phone to a friend who might be in a similar trouble and talk. Talk out. You for m that togetherness. And you will find your craving will go and you will become more happier, more uplifted. So what does that mean? Communication. And you have to communicate first to get rid of separation.
5. U S 86 - 51 So the lack people have mostly is in communication. They do not know what communication is all about. The only communication people think of mostly is sexual communication. That's not communication. It is in a form where there is deep love; otherwise i ts just lust. Right. Fine. But the true communication comes from the mind level, and still more powerful is from the spiritual level, where the spirit just merges away into everyone and everything around you. That is my method, where I allow that spiri tual force, of which I am an instrument of course, I allow that spiritual force to pour out and communicate with the so called individualized spirit. Of course there is only one spirit, but when we say individualized it's like the sun shining on a pond wi th a whole lot of bubbles and you see a thousand reflections and you think it's a thousand suns; actually it's one sun. Or like a radio broadcast, there is only one broadcast but it's heard over a million radios. So you cannot say it's a million broadcas ts or transmissions. There's only one transmission. Like that, there is only one spirit. So you start off regarding the person to be an individual spirit and allow your individual spirit to merge with another individual spirit. And by doing that, you wi ll slowly find that there is only one spirit, always. Only one. Do you see? So separation comes from fear, and fear comes from a sense of not having self confidence. You do not feel confident, you feel at loss. That if I am with someone... you don't f eel confident to be with someone. And that, of course, in turn is caused by a sense of inadequacy. Now no one in this world is inadequate at all. Everyone is adequate in his own sphere. Adequate. Everyone is adequate to communicate. Everyone is adequa te to love. Everyone is adequate to exchange ideas. That's communication. Once you have that kind of communication, where is the question of separation? So the word separation is a misnomer. It makes no sense to me at all. I wonder why people feel it, I can't understand it. There is no such thing. Am I separate from you, if you take it from a scientific point of view that we are all composed of one mass of molecular matter. One mass, inseparable. Actually, if you condense it more, we are only one at om. And the nucleus is that Divinity. Do you see? And around the nuclei all those protons and electrons swirl around thinking they are individuals, yet the pull of the nuclei is there, keeping it moving and moving, swirling. Keeping it in motion. Now where there is motion it is always continuous. Motion never stops. With the untrained eye it might seem it is stopping. It is no t. Try this experiment. Take a piece of rope... string and tie a light to it. Light it or burn a light or take an electric bulb (don't shock yourself, though), right, and just turn it, just turn it and you will find it a circle. Try it, it's a circle. When y ou stop, then it becomes individual. Do you get the point, do you see the analogy? Yes. Take a flaming torch and jus t swirl it and you would view it, look in the mirror and view it, or let someone else see it, it's one circle of fire. And that is what life is all about. That is wh at communication is all about. So you don't stop and call yourself separate, because you are a part of that circle. Do you see.
6. U S 86 - 51 And of course, the mover of that light rotating around is that divine force that is within you. So where is separation? You are the circle moving it. So move in circles, because everything in life is a circle. You will start and you will end at the same place. And to put it in theological terms, you come from God and you end in God. Everything, everything, just study everything, it's a circle. Look at the seasons, for example, they operate cyclically. Anythi ng, anything, anything. Anything. Even your tumble drier when you wash your clothes moves in circles. So be a circle and don't be a square! [Laughs] Because a square has corners and those corners can prick you and stick you and hurt you. But a circle h as no squares. Start off with a hula hoop, and twist your fanny, let the hoop move. Do you see? In other words coordinate your fanny with your brain, in other words it means... ROSHAN: Get your ass in gear. [Laughter] GURURAJ: In other words it mea ns the coordination of the body with the brain. And when there is a coordination of the body with the brain, then you are becoming integrated. And when there is integration within you, you would feel integrated with everything around you, and you do not feel separate. The sense of separation is also the cause of depression. You feel depressed. It's also the cause of loneliness. Because separation itself implies loneliness and you feel lonely. And the more lonelier you start feeling, the more separate d you feel from everything around you. Do you see. Now what do you do about loneliness in practical terms? What do you do about loneliness? Join some clubs. Right. Meditation Society, call it a club if you want to, a family. Or any cultural society, a rt society, whatever your interest is. Where is the separation? Do you see. You are never, never, never, never separated. You only think you are separated. Because everything you do there is a connection. Even when you sit to eat there is a connectio n between you and the food that you are consuming. Now if you were separated from the food you'd die of starvation. Do you see? Even the glass of water you drink, you are not separated from it. You are not even separated from your clothes. They have b ecome part of you. When you wear your clothes, when you put on your clothes, like you are dressed now, are you conscious that you are wearing clothes? No. It becomes part of you, like this chair has become part of me. Right. [Coughs] (I want to separ ate myself from my cold and cough.) Do you see. So separation is a misnomer, as I said before. Everything in life points to the factor that you are at one ment with everything. One reason why you feel separated is because of your emotions. Your emoti ons make you feel that there is no response to my emotions. Now examine the emotions. How valid are they? Roshan, for example, wants to marry the Princess of Persia. She's very wealthy, you know. So he, being a businessman, he's not only looking at her prettiness but also the wealth. Right. Now because he can't get the Princess of Persia, he feels separated. [Laughs] So what I'm
7. U S 86 - 51 trying to say is this, don't try and achieve that which is unattainable. Try and be together with that which is attainable , which is accessible, and your separation will disappear. Even if it's your cat or dog, feel together with the cat and dog. Do you see? But if you do have a cat please give it some pee training because the carpet would stink. [Laughs] VOICE: Sutriya' s going to write this down. [Laughter] GURURAJ: Do you see the point I'm making, dear? Do you see the point? Yes. But have one thing firm in mind, and even use it as an affirmation when you wake up in the morning and before you fall asleep at night, that I am not separate, I am part and parcel of one whole, and that does not include one person or a group of persons, or the world, it includes the entire universe. You are not separate from the universe. If the real essence of you is destroyed, the ent ire universe will collapse, because the essence in you is the universe. Do you see? So separation is a misconception. Not only a misconception but a deception perpetrated on ourselves by ourselves. Do you feel separate from me? AVA: My mind does, my u nconscious doesn't. GURURAJ: Your unconscious doesn't, ah, very good. But your conscious mind does, so there is something wrong in your thinking. Because the conscious mind thinks and there is nothing unconscious, everything is conscious. You know, t his Jung, I wish I had him here, I'd kick his ass. There is no such thing as unconscious, because unconsciousness cannot exist when everything is consciousness and Divinity is consciousness itself. As I must have said earlier or whenever, that being omni present, how can there be a place for any unconsciousness. There is no unconsciousness. What he might have meant is something which is unknowable by the conscious mind. There is nothing unconscious, everything is consciousness and it could be realizable , experienceable. Do you see? Now tell me, why would a person's mind say that I am separate from you? Why would it say that? To recap again, it is because of fear, because of anxiety, because of feeling lost, because of feeling not wanted. Now if I sho uld tell you I love you very deeply, will your mind still say that I am separate from you? No. There you are, there's your answer. You won't say that. Do you see. So now, for a person to say I love you, you got to love the person first. I might have s aid this before sometime, I don't know, that to be loved, become loveable. To become together, do not separate yourself from others. Have some form of communication. If you are interested in art, be with artists, share your ideas in art. For that is
8. U S 86 - 51 th e glory, and for that is the reason why we are born is to find togetherness with all of humanity. And by doing that, we find oneness with the entire universe and with Divinity. Do you see? That is why I don't teach in South Africa, because I'd be jaile d. The South African policies believe in separatism, you know white and black, and this that. You can't even live in the same area. The blacks would have their own area to live in, the whites their own area, the Indians their own area, the colored their own area. They call it the Group Areas Act: separatism. If I take a walk with you, being dark, if I take a walk with you down one of the streets of South Africa, we are bound to be arrested for attempted immorality. And if we get caught in bed together , we go to jail six months, just like that, although there are many reforms being made now because of outside world pressure. Do you see. Separatism. So how can I teach there when I teach oneness, non separateness. I was warned. I used to give a lectu re every week for a few years. Then I was warned, officially warned, by a very good friend in higher circles, stop it. It is better to have a g uru floating around than to be locked up in jail. You know the story of Nelson Mandela, he is rotting away for twenty years, twenty odd years in jail. Do you see. So there is no separation at all. What happens in South Africa is political, just to preserve that white supremacy. You know, not to lose their power. And there is a long history behind it, how it al l began. Of course that's a different subject and I'm no politician. I think Rousseau or Voltaire said that politics is the professio n of the second best. So one newspaper in an interview I think it was a Canadian paper we discussed this and I said po litics is second best. And they asked me who is the best. I say, "I," because I haven't found a really honest politician yet. I know plenty of them. I even had to be a member of the president's council of South Africa. They approached me, I said, "No thank you, not interested, my health is not too good." Why go into details. Do you see? So I'm a teacher of togetherness and to me separation is not in my dictionary. It's not in my dick's canary. [Laughs] Do you see. So never feel yourself apart fro m anything. Never feel yourself apart from anything whatsoever. What's wrong with Dick's canary, huh? I have a friend, Dick; he has a canary. And he lives on Canary Islands. So to get back [END SIDE ONE] you know, we always have a bit of fun in be tween. You just can't be serious all the time. You've got to have a few laughs, you know, to relieve the tension. And tension is another reason for separation. Where you feel so tense to approach someone. Or you feel tense if someone approaches you. Tension produces strain, strain produces all the ailments in your body and makes your mind more separated from things because you can't just bear it anymore, the stress and the strain, the tension. Do you see. So once you feel together... Look, I've bee n in hundred and hundreds of homes, you know, around the world lecturing, and everywhere I go I just feel at home, because I do not feel separate from anything, anyone. Do you see?
9. U S 86 - 51 Develop that sense. And as I've said before, affirm to yourself in your mind, I am not separate, I fear nothing. How can I fear anything? Who can harm me when that force is with me? And that force can be symbolized through your guru. Yea. You will be given a practice when you start on gurushakti, and you'll feel, you'll feel that force, that energy with you all the time. So all the psychiatric treatments they have their certain value, but a very, very limited value. Because a psychiatri st will analy ze you, a psychologist will psychoanalyze you and they know nothing; these are just experimental sciences of which they have not reached anywhere at all. Do you see. But if there is a spiritual force there, then all the problems wil l be gone. And most p eople's problems are more mental than physical, and mental problems often translate themselves organically. Most problems are psychosomatic. So do not feel separated from anything. Okay? Okay! Good. Good for you. I've given you in one session more th an the psychiatrist will give you in twenty. That's one hour. Okay? She was complaining to me yesterday that you were going to speak for one hour and you spoke for fifty seven minutes. So I made up five minutes extra. Good. She times me. She watches me. She's a wonderful secretary to me. ***END***
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